You might be wondering: When is the right time to start therapy? There isn’t one answer. Are things not going the way you want and you don’t know why? Are you struggling with feelings you have no idea what to do with? Do you have worries you can’t talk to anyone about, not even your friends? Have you even thought about therapy for a specific reason – a problem you’ve lived with for a very long time? These are all good reasons for therapy. But, how do you choose a virtual stranger to talk to and choose well?
Here are some things you might want to know about me and how I think:
I’m trained as a psychoanalyst. What that means is that I take seriously each symptom or problem you bring and help you work out the not-so-conscious roots. Everyone comes to therapy with a very particular history of childhood relationships, traumas, and losses; people who haven’t given you what you needed, experiences that have hurt. I will help you think about your symptoms in the context of your history. I will help you make links.
Symptoms are unconscious feelings and memories, or the result of ways you’ve managed what’s been too difficult to manage. Those memories and feelings hidden in your symptoms originated early in life; were shut out of your awareness; and are now ‘remembered’ in your body; your behaviors; in the places where you are stuck.
We all repeat parts of our histories in our self-perceptions; our feelings; our later relationships, and in what we believe we can or cannot expect. These repetitions aren’t conscious. What’s going on may seem related only to a current situation, but it’s not. Unconscious repetitions take place in therapy too if therapy is to work. Our relationship is a microcosm; a window into your very individual internal universe, into the ways the past is still alive right now.
If you work with me, I will listen closely to everything you tell me and offer new understandings of not only what happened long ago, but also how the past affects your current relationships and feelings. What emerges between us, what needs to be understood, and what needs to change, allows a therapy to unfold that is yours and like no one else’s.
As we talk, hour-by-hour, we’ll piece together the origins of your symptoms and work them out. Therapy can free you to do what you want to do, have what you need, and be more openly who you are without the worries, self-doubts, and self-judgments that have interfered with your confidence and success.