LOS ANGELES WILDFIRES: Sudden Loss, PTSD & How to Heal
The Los Angeles Wildfires have devasted our city with sudden loss and PTSD. Many of you have been shattered more than others, displaced, and faced with the loss of your homes and precious belongings. The heartbreak and shock is enormous. Numbing, anxiety, depression, and fear are part of any loss. How do you deal with the enormity of it all? You might be wondering: Do I have PTSD? If so, what does it take to heal? How do I (we) go on?
Going on means managing difficult feelings and gaining perspective on what those feelings are. It’s common for a serious trauma to trigger old unresolved losses and traumas that haven’t been top of mind. A trauma like the sudden losses in the wildfires brings new and old PTSD symptoms. The first step to dealing with a tragedy - and healing - is understanding what you’re experiencing.
So, let’s start with what PTSD is to begin laying out a map for navigating your wildfire grief.
LA Wildfires & PTSD: Do You Have It?
You likely have PTSD due to the Los Angeles Wildfires and your losses. Here's what PTSD is:
PTSD (or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) occurs as a result of an uncontrollable and terrifying event. That is certainly the Los Angeles Wildfires. Raging through your neighborhood and life. Taking what is yours: your home, your security, your mementos, your everything. And, you are helpless.
It’s happening to you. You can’t stop it or do anything except try to escape and watch it unfold. That’s nothing short of horrifying. And, in the face of this kind of terror, certain symptoms occur.
Like numbness taking over at first. Numbness is a response to shock and terror. The shock and terror of the Los Angeles Wildfires do cause PTSD. It's no wonder you went numb.
Did you feel numb in the immediacy of losing your home or being evacuated (and maybe you still do)? That’s normal. It’s one symptom of PTSD. The reality of the wildfires, sudden loss, and grief is too much to wrap your mind around. It's too much for anyone.
You can take steps so that any of the following PTSD symptoms you have in the aftermath of your trauma don’t become prolonged. I’ll discuss those steps in the healing section of this article.
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms include:
- Flashbacks, nightmares, or unwanted memories of the event
- Avoiding people, places, or activities that remind you of the trauma
- Fear, anger, guilt, shame, or feeling numb or empty
- Irritability, angry outbursts, or being easily startled
- Insomnia or having trouble sleeping
- Difficulty concentrating or paying attention
- Feeling isolated or cut off from others
- Having beliefs like "The world is unsafe"
- Being constantly on the lookout for signs of danger
- Sweating, heart palpitations, anxiety, or panic
PTSD symptoms can be severe, and persistent, and can significantly impact your daily life. Above are the symptoms. Let’s look at what else may be underlying them and what you can do to heal.
Is Old Loss Triggered By The LA Wildfires?
Your sudden loss and trauma caused by the LA Wildfires can trigger some of the PTSD symptoms I’ve listed. Yet, if your symptoms are numerous or unrelenting, it’s likely that the trauma of the fires has triggered previous traumas or losses. That’s not uncommon. Everyone does their best to cope with trauma. If you’ve had significant traumas or losses, you went on the best you could. You thought it was in the past.
Why would it be triggered now?
- You didn’t grieve your earlier loss (es) because you didn’t have help.
- You went numb, toughened up, “forgot,” or told yourself you’re ok.
- You believed you had to manage alone and are “weak” if you can’t.
- You didn’t have anyone to turn to and it’s hard for you to trust.
Any of these reasons is enough to have an old loss (or losses) buried inside you. Psychologically, it’s called dissociation. More common words are disconnecting or “forgetting.”
You “forget” when the feelings or fears are unbearable and you don’t have another way of coping.
Catastrophic fears and hypervigilance can occur in the aftermath of the Los Angeles Wildfires and PTSD.
Do You Have Catastrophic Fears?
Are you living with catastrophic fears about what is going to happen next? Worrying constantly? Living in fear?
That can happen. You are now on the lookout for signs of danger.
You’ve just been through a catastrophe in the wildfires. Especially if you lost your home and all your belongings.
That is shattering and you must feel overwhelming sadness. You’ve also experienced intense fear.
Seeing fire encroaching on your home and security, the place where you’ve lived and raised your family, your SAFE place, is terrifying. You were helpless. Had no control. Were forced to get away fast.
Maybe you were even afraid you couldn’t get out. Or you didn’t know what to grab and take with you. You felt rattled, unable to think or focus, terrified for your life and your family.
Now it’s hard to feel safe in Los Angeles or even the world. You feel scared all the time. That's a part of the aftermath of the Los Angeles Wildfires and PTSD. You're anxious and you can’t settle down.
Is Your Anxiety Too Much?
Not being able to settle down is an anxiety reaction. There are many different ways to feel anxiety.
You might feel close to panic. Irritable and easily startled. Or, you might fly off the handle. Have little patience, even though this isn’t your nature. You can’t sleep. Are you having nightmares? Your body and mind are on high alert. Noises make you jump. And, your heart races. You don’t feel safe.
Not feeling safe is completely understandable in the aftermath of LA’s devasting fires. And, anxiety is very hard to live with. Although anxiety is a normal reaction to feeling unsafe, there are individual reasons for your anxiety that aren’t as obvious as the above symptoms and feelings.
You know you’ve been in danger, displaced, or lost way too much.
Yet, underneath the anxiety symptoms are unconscious associations with danger that can date back to earlier times in your life. If your anxiety persists and overwhelms you, it’s important to get help.
A professional who works with you to uncover the other past sources now linked to your anxiety can help you overcome it. That’s particularly important if you’re also feeling all alone.
Are You Feeling All Alone?
One symptom of PTSD following the Los Angeles Wildfires or any traumatic event is isolating yourself. That might be because you feel safer not venturing out. As if staying alone and being careful is a remedy to taking any risks that could hurt you. Or you’re anxious and depressed and don’t have the energy you feel is required of you to connect.
Do you often feel that connecting with people requires more of you than you receive? Or that it’s your job to keep things going? Even have a long-standing belief you can’t take without giving?
These beliefs are most often rooted in childhood fears and experiences. Particularly if you had early trauma in your life and you were alone then with no one to count on or trust to help you. You withdrew. Turned inward. You tried your best to manage on your own. This might resurface now.
And, let’s assume your depression is more than the grief about your current losses and what’s happened. Then you really need to have people around you who care and want to listen and help.
Although isolation is a common anxiety and depression reaction, it’s important to fight it. Isolating makes you feel more alone and reinforces your worries, fears, anxiety, and depression symptoms.
But what if you’re blaming yourself for something? And part of your isolation is shame and regret?
Can’t Stop Your Regrets?
Let’s say you have regrets about what you didn’t take with you from your home or you’re beating yourself up for not thinking more clearly about saving something precious and irreplaceable.
That’s not fair to you. You can’t be expected to think clearly when you’re terrified and in danger. Self-blame and shame are a reaction to early trauma – particularly if you were criticized, felt not good enough, or lived in fear of doing something wrong. This likely made you hard on yourself.
Before the recent losses you couldn’t control, you lived with other situations that were out of your hands. Children feel it’s their fault even when it isn’t. They don’t have another way to see it.
Try to remember: You did the best you could. It isn’t your fault. You were scared, with little time.
Feeling depressed is common following a serious loss or traumatic situation. But, if your sad mood is carrying over into hopelessness, defeat, guilt, self-blame, or bad feelings about yourself, that’s another story. And, if these feelings worsen or don’t lift, it’s a reaction to more than now.
What can you do to heal your regrets (if you have them), along with the painful losses you’ve endured (your current and past ones)? First and above all else, let yourself grieve. Cry. A lot.
Importance of Grieving
Grieving is one of the most important things you can do to heal from a loss. Crying heals.
It’s not always easy to get to the crying, though. You need to accept the loss and that’s difficult when your anxiety, regrets, disbelief, or numbness get in the way. Give yourself space and time. That's what you need to begin to heal from the traumatic Los Angeles Wildfires and PTSD.
Grief has various stages, not linear or the same for everyone. Typically, you’ll experience these:
- Denial: Shock, disbelief, panic, or confusion
- Anger: Blaming yourself or others
- Bargaining: Guilt, such as "If only I had done more"
- Depression: Tiredness, hopelessness, or helplessness
- Acceptance: Accepting the loss and readiness to move on
Let yourself go through your process. No one grieves in the same way. There isn’t right or wrong.
Your loss from the fires is new. Old losses might be affecting you. Practice self-acceptance as much as you can. If you can’t, or feel overwhelmed or stuck in any of these grief feelings, or symptoms of anxiety, depression, guilt, or hopelessness, you would benefit from professional help.
Help for Healing Wildfire Losses
Besides grieving, what else can help you heal?
- The most important thing is having people you can turn to.
- Choose someone who can listen, care, and hear you. That’s essential to healing.
- Empathy is the best healer. Someone to sit with you and allow space for your feelings.
- Turn to friends or family.
- Find the most empathic people in your life.
- Let them be there for you.
- Accept their offers of help without feeling you’re asking too much.
- Even if that’s hard, try. It will help you more than you can imagine.
- Take advantage of the resources offered in the aftermath of the fires.
- Below are some resources that might help you.
1. Join a Support Group:
SHARE Disaster Support Groups:
https://shareselfhelp.org/disaster-resources/
Wellness for Humanity
https://www.wellness4humanity.com/los-angeles-california-fire-support-group
Disaster Distress Helpline:
Call or text 1-800-985-5990 or text "TalkWithUs" to 66746 to connect with a trained counselor
Free Virtual Support Group LA Fires:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/angela-costello-los-angeles-ca/81117?gid=257984
2. Call Crisis Hotlines
The 988 Suicide and Crisis hotline can be reached by calling or texting 988. The 988 Lifeline Chat can also be accessed here.
3. Find a Trauma Therapist
There are many trauma therapists. Look online. Find one that feels like a good match for you.
My number one recommendation for healing from PTSD in the aftermath of a trauma, especially one that causes significant loss and upheaval in your life is: DON’T TRY TO GO IT ALONE.
Find and use all the avenues of support offered as much as you possibly can. Fight any feelings of shame or weakness. It is of essential importance to have and allow help when you're suffering from PTSD after a traumatic event like the Los Angeles Wildfires. If you have questions, please reach out at sandracohenphd@gmail.com.
My thoughts and compassion are with you.
