Moving Forward Blog
Can’t Feel Your Feelings? Your Numbness May Be Transgenerational Trauma
Numbing your pain is not a conscious choice. It could be transgenerational trauma. Numbness is a common survival strategy, a self-protection from emotional overwhelm, beginning in childhood, during and after trauma. And, it’s often passed down for generations. Transgenerational trauma is real and numbness and trauma go together. Without knowing it, you experience your parents’…
Why Hunger for Love Can Steer You Wrong
Hunger for love can steer you wrong. Do you end up with critical partners who make you feel like you’re asking too much and gaslight you into feeling something’s wrong with you? You can’t figure out if that’s true. Here’s the reality. Many things might blind you: 1. Turning away from safe love because real…
You’ve Shut Yourself Down to Love. Why & How to Change That
You’ve been hurt by love. Maybe many times. Here’s what can happen: You criticize yourself for wanting anything. Feel stupid if you try to date. Believe it won’t work out before you even try. Wonder how anyone could love you because of “the way you are.” Tell yourself that you’re OK alone, it’s better that…
Breaking Free of Secrets After Childhood Sexual Abuse
You were sexually abused and violated by someone you needed to trust. Now, you struggle with whether or not to keep your childhood sexual abuse a secret and who is safe to tell. Secrets leave you much too alone. But is anyone safe? Your trust is fragile and you’re wary of people. Understandably. The question…
Do You Struggle with Anger After Childhood Abuse? That’s Normal
Anger after childhood abuse is normal. Yet, you probably struggle to express it. Either you stuff it down, feel guilty about it, or are (or were) told your anger is wrong or “bad,” so that’s how you think about it. Or you can’t control it when your anger does come out. Here’s the reality: Anger…
LOS ANGELES WILDFIRES: Sudden Loss, PTSD & How to Heal
The Los Angeles Wildfires have devasted our city with sudden loss and PTSD. Many of you have been shattered more than others, displaced, and faced with the loss of your homes and precious belongings. The heartbreak and shock is enormous. Numbing, anxiety, depression, and fear are part of any loss. How do you deal with…
Do You See (Or Not See) Red Flags? From The Film Woman of the Hour
Who will hurt you the most? That’s the hidden question in Anna Kendrick’s Woman of the Hour. And, as a woman, how do you tell? It’s by seeing (or not seeing) red flags. Sometimes, you can’t see them when you’re lonely or hungry for attention and love. Other times, when you have reasons not to…
Fear of More Loss Brings Disconnection from the film HIS THREE DAUGHTERS
When you’ve already lost too much and live in fear of more loss, that can make you disconnect. This is where we find the three sisters in Azazel Jacobs’s His Three Daughters. Disconnected. They each have a method of disconnection and each has her reasons. But disconnection is lonely and creates more loss, even if…
INSIDE OUT 2: Fear Of Being Alone Triggers Old Trauma & Brings On Anxiety
If you’ve experienced past trauma, an old trauma trigger will bring on Anxiety. And, for Riley Anderson in Kelsey Mann’s Inside Out 2, it’s her fear of being alone. So, it isn’t just the new emotions of puberty that make Anxiety now take center stage and push away Joy, Sadness, Fear, Anger, and Disgust into…
MAN Versus BEAR? Women’s Traumas, Shattered Trust & Why The Bear Wins
Man Versus Bear went viral. Even though a controversy rages, let’s be clear about why the Bear wins. The Bear gets the vote because of the past traumas and shattered trust of too many women. Those women have experienced childhood trauma, physical abuse, sexual abuse, and later sexual traumas, mostly perpetrated by a man that…
IS FOMO DRIVING YOU CRAZY? Quitting Scrolling Isn’t Enough
Do you have FOMO? FOMO can drive you crazy. Likely you have low self-esteem and “social comparison” anxiety. So, if you want to cure your FOMO, just quitting scrolling on social media isn’t enough. You wouldn’t be caught up comparing yourself (and always falling short), and maybe then buying things to try to make yourself…
INSIDE OUT: Why Sadness Matters, Especially After Trauma
Sadness matters. Especially after trauma. Every feeling matters—all the time. Feelings are normal and human. We all have them. Yet, do you – Fight them? Hide them? Feel Shame about them? Want to crawl under a table if they show? Peter Doctor’s Inside Out isn’t just a children’s movie. It’s for everyone who struggles with…
Why Most Adults Who Suffered Childhood Trauma Are Still Suffering
Adults suffering childhood trauma is all too common, even if you thought you got over it. You grew up. Did the best you could and “moved on.” But, you’ve had a lot of struggles. You’ve suffered anxiety. You don’t feel lovable. And, you haven’t been able to find love that works. You’re afraid of wanting…
9 Signs of Repressed Childhood Trauma in Adults & What To Do About It
Do you think you might have childhood trauma? Something’s been nagging at you. You can’t remember anything specific, but you’ve been wondering about it. You’ve heard about repressed childhood trauma in adults. What is that exactly? Do you have it? How could you find out? That’s a tough question If you did suffer trauma in…
6 Ways Abandonment
As A Child Affects You
Healing Means a Place to Grieve
Did you suffer abandonment as a child? Were you neglected? The child of divorce. In foster care. Or left to figure things out on your own? If so, you may still be suffering the effects. It’s very likely that you have abandonment trauma and don’t know it. This can go on for years. It’s never…
Feelings of Hopelessness? That’s Not A Necessary Part of Grief
You’ve lost someone and now you’re struggling with feelings of hopelessness about the future and finding love again. And, on top of that, it’s been a really, really hard few years. The pandemic, its isolation, and all of the changes in the world itself have heaped even more grief and sadness on top of losing…
How Do You Get Over a Narcissist
& Get Your Self-Esteem Back?
Do you think you’re in a relationship with a narcissist? Here’s what you need to know about how dating a narcissist changes you and very likely has hurt your self-esteem: Narcissists draw you in with their charm and compliments. But what do you do now that you’re living with constant hurt, deprivation, confusion, and feeling…
Can Anxiety Be Cured?
Yes, And Here’s How
Anxiety is immobilizing. It makes you scared and interferes with almost everything you do (or try to do). If you have constant generalized anxiety; panic attacks; or obsessive worry, you know this all too well. And living in a pandemic for over a year, you don’t know what’s safe anymore. You may even be scared…
AFRAID OF LOVE?
Normal Fears or Philophobia?
Do you have Philophobia? Are you wondering what that is? Ask yourself these questions: Are you afraid of love? Making excuses not to get too close? Are you in and out, often pushing someone away? Do you tell yourself you’re satisfied with only casual sex? Did you know that if your fear of love is…
Are You Scared to Speak Out?
Here’s How to Find Your Voice
Are you scared to speak out? That’s not unusual if you live with “shoulds” or “should not’s” that are stopping you inside your mind. But, even so, it’s not impossible to find your voice. However, it does take some courage and understanding. So, here’s how. Yes, people all over the country are speaking out and…
Is Uncertainty Hard For You?
Reasons Why & Ways To Cope
Are you unsettled, insecure, and expecting something bad to happen in this uncertain COVID-19 time? Do you wonder why some of your friends seem to manage uncertainty and don’t feel the same way? That’s complicated. There are and have been way too many uncertainties in the past 8 months. It’s a scary time. It’s hard…
5 Suggestions for Prolonged Grief
In the Pandemic
Does your sadness not stop? Do you feel trapped in a cycle of despair? You’re not alone. Eight months of a pandemic is enough to put anyone in a state of prolonged grief. But there are things you can do to get out of it. It might be hard to believe that. And, with all…
How Do You Date in a Pandemic?
Safe & Slow Must Be The New Normal
You’re lonely. How do you date in a pandemic that keeps dragging on and on? You keep asking yourself: “What can I do about it? How do I date safely now? ” You don’t want to be alone. Maybe, you haven’t been in a relationship since COVID-19 forced you into isolation. Or you broke up…
COVID-19 Germaphobia
& Childhood Trauma Ways To Defeat Your Fears
Do you have COVID-19 germaphobia? Are you very anxious about invisible germs? Here are things that can help. Even if you weren’t germaphobic or hypochondriacal before, these fears can take over in the dangerous situation we’re all in during COVID-19. But how much danger is there and exactly where? One thing is true. There are…
3 Reasons For Secrets
After Childhood Sexual Abuse
Childhood sexual abuse leaves you with secrets and fear. You live behind walls. Alone. Vigilant. Angry. Always afraid. It’s hard to allow help. People aren’t to be trusted. If you live in this lonely world, you might wonder: Is there anyone to reach inside my pain? There is if you can take the leap. Sexual…
Breaking Up Feels Like
The End Of The World
4 Reasons Why & How to Heal
Have you just had a breakup? Sometimes, breaking up feels like the end of the world. If you feel your life is over and have no idea how to go on, here’s a stanza from the 1966 Skeeter Davis song End of the World that says it all: Why does my heart go on beating?…
6 Ways to Outwit Despair
In COVID-19 Quarantine
Feel trapped in the quarantine of COVID-19? Here are 6 ways to outwit despair. Even if you see no clear way out, don’t think it’s dangerous to hope. It’s not. Hope is a necessary thing. It’s what breaks through those bars of despair. Be inspired to live, even if it’s different. Don’t give in or…
5 Ways to be a Friend
In COVID-19’s Loneliness
5 Ways To Be A Friend Do you have a friend who is alone? Waiting for someone to say: “Hello in there?” John Prine died tragically of COVID-19. His lyrics live on. Here are 5 ways to be the friend, a lonely friend needs. Prine’s song is a reminder we all need, in this time…
Sexual Abuse Victims Must Be Heard
The #Me Too Movement opened the door for voices of sexual abuse victims to be heard. If you’re a victim of sexual abuse, it’s very important to speak out. Here’s why: Scars Of Sexual Abuse Can Last A Lifetime Sexual abuse is a terrible violation and betrayal. You had no control. Couldn’t say “no.” You…
Overcoming Persistent Depression
It Isn’t Easy
Facing Your Fear Of Anger Helps
Want to overcome persistent depression? You don’t have to live with the fear of your anger any longer. Help is possible. If you’re stuck in cycles of depression that keep going on and on, you probably know very well that self-critical voice in your head that finds fault with you. You probably don’t know the…
